Keep that trap shut !!


 *A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.  Suddenly her husband burst into the kitchen.

 “Careful . CAREFUL!   Put in some more butter!   Oh my GOD!  You’re cooking too many at once.

TOO MANY!  Turn them!  TURN THEM NOW!   We need more butter.
Oh my GOD!   WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They’re going to STICK!

Careful …. CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you’re cooking!

 Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don’t forget to salt them.

You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!”*
 

*The wife stared at him. “What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don’t know how to fry a couple of eggs?”*

 *The husband calmly replied, “I wanted to show you what it feels like when I’m driving.”

This was so funny but true and I actually started wondering how Sam must feel. Although I am not EXACTLY like how SHE probably is but then, I too am very alert when Sam is driving and “occasionally” I will “Input” my

  ” take the right, its open”   or ” dont you think we’re driving too slow ? ” or

 “we’re goinna get the light if you dont hurry up” or

” Sam, why are you letting the world run into our  lane ?” 

But when I read this funny other-end-of-the-story, I got thinking. I admit, ok I am a confident and safe driver who drives almost completely by the rules. But how irritating it must be to sit with someone whom you know is going to start with their comments of where and how you should drive.

I suddenly thought about how I feel when I am driving with Daddy sitting next to me. In spite of being confident and having driven on a certain road for at least 150 times (the road to my kids school), I get so nervous and tensed when he is sitting next to me. almost ready with his,

” why dont you cross that car ? or

” why are you going so fast ? or

” why dont you go faster ?? or

” In my days …………

In Bombay , India, I remember I had got my learner’s ” riding” licence and had my ” more-than- fair-share” of riding experience. 

 I was riding on the highway, bazaars, long routes, heavy rains ! between nasty trucks, carrying mom in the back, sometimes  my nephews in the back and front and what not !!! All this for nearly 1 year !!!!!!  CAN YOU BELIEVE ALL OF THIS AND ON A “LEARNERS LICENSE “

I felt so free, I was like a bird. I could soar as high in the air and knew exactly how to maneouvr the bike. After sometime, it was all but ” Reflex ”    

How many accidents ?   

Well two really nasty accidents.

Once was, when a tanker had just passed by on a concrete road, spilling oil on the way and my bike skid on that. oh that was nasty alright. I must have skid lying down with the bike for nearly 150 meters if not more. Those days the helmet was not as strictly applied as it is these days by the traffic police so naturally I did’nt bother with it, either. How I survived that accident with scores of cars all around me !! Miracle 1 

The other one was by a bunch of guys who felt they wanted to scare us of our bike, when I was driving my sister to her job interview !!   They were in a Maruti van and they came up speedily behind us and when they were overtaking wanted to push us a side, instead, they got too close and hit the bike.  Sham jumped off the bike immediately on the impact and I skid along with the bike. There were cars everywhere – all in high speed. How I survived without being mowed over by another car ??     Miracle 2       As usual, there is huge crowd that surrounds you when an accident happens, mainly out of curiosity and so it happened. I was under shock, I got up without noticing the intensity of injury to myself and ran back to my sister who had relatively less apparent injury.  She had fallen in the sitting position so her hip had taken the impact.  Then there was a Mixture of:   fear for the damage to the bike,  guilt over my sister getting hurt, and embarrassment over the whole thing. Ofcourse I was immense shock and pain and almost delirious but I managed to do the weirdest thing. I searched for my purse, luckily it was not stolen so far ! I examined the bike, picked the bike, gave it a kick start, luckily it started immediately and got my sis on, the crowd kept saying, I was mad.  I have little recollection of the strength it took me to get to the nearest, (no not hospital,  you wont believe it ) nearest hang out, carter road.  Thats where I saw,  My left leg had been completely scraped from hip to my  tiny toes, I could barely see anything on my left arm except blood, there was blood oozing from my forehead.  My sister panicked seeing the intensity of my hurts. Frankly So did I. But I didnt tell her or show her how I felt.  

No, at that time I was completly petrified of what Daddy would do.  There were no mobiles those days. India is not the kind of place, you just leave your bike and move on in an accident. We managed to clean some of my wounds. The rest were too many and too harsh for us to do anything and slowly but steadily we rode the bike home. Then ofcourse the drama started ………. . ……………… . …………….. .  …………

OK COMING BACK TO MY MAIN STORY, so I had been riding, gained plenty of confidence and blah blah blah… and then daddy suggested I get my Riding Licence. After a year of riding, dad took me to the RTO, , Dad was standing right at the left side of the ground,  I just had to make an 8 while riding. simple. had done it a million times if not more. But low and  behold, I JUST FROZE !!!  I could not even keep the balance of the bike !!!! Well thats the great effect my dad had on me !!  Everyone vouched for how safe and confident rider I was and to be able to tell everyone that I had flunked !!!!  

I dont blame him at all. Today, I have been driving since past 9 years. I have an 8 cylinder GMC Yukon XL. She is a huge car and I love driving her.  But reading that little article in the beginning made me realize, that what ever else the outcome, I am going to keep my trap shut while my husband drives. Thank you.

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