I’m not sure from where this one landed in one of my files, some of them are hilarious while some of them are pretty weird like no #8 and #7
The Top 15 Job-Hunting Tips
15. Don’t mention you only want the job to hold you over until that Nigerian businessman’s estate sends you your $27 million.
14. Writing “no permanent address” on the application form might be counter-productive. 13. First impressions matter! Offer the recruiter a sip from your juice box.
12. It’s still considered bad form to list your parole officer or bail bondsman as a personal reference.
11. Since most female executives are a little insecure, they appreciate compliments on their breasts — particularly if you use really, really big words you learned in your online college courses.
10. Never go job hunting with Dick Cheney.
9. Do not write your cover letter using a #2 pencil. Or a pointy stick with #2 on the end of it.
8. Ixnay on the igpay atinlay, Esterchay.
7. During first interviews, limit usage of the phrase “So long as Daddy gets his taste.”
6. On a resume, it’s considered poor form to mention the javelin stuck in your back. However, before the interview, go ahead and inquire about the dimensions of the elevators.
5. Speaking Klingon does not make you multilingual, geekboy.
4. During the interview, it’s a good idea not to show *too* much interest in the details of the drug testing program.
3. Don’t show off your research by naming all the employees you consider do-able.
2. Leave your interviewer a thank-you card with a small gift enclosed, such as a wallet-sized rectangular portrait of Benjamin Franklin.
and the Number 1 Job-Hunting Tip…
1. Can’t find a job opening? Meet people who have the kind of job you want, then kill one………..