The Stroller

The advert said, ‘designed for comfort and safety of your precious little one’

Six months later, mom asked,

but where would the baby bag go ?

but where would little johnny’s rattle go, his bottle go, his bibs go, his pacifier, his teddy, his cap, his socks go ?

and his bag of toys ?

and where would the gift box for Anna’s party go ?

and what about the laptop, spare sandals, grocery bags, baby blanket, and what not !!

DSC_1886

A year later …….

Introducing the efficient way to carry it all !!  minus the baby 🙂

the stroller

Just to clarify, We have three children, and our strollers, were homes on wheels to our boys, only when they slept 🙂 The rest of the time, they were used for carrying just about everything under the sky 🙂

My son after me . . . .

The past couple of weeks have been full of doctors appointments and follow ups. I have been suffering from various small issues and so has hubby. Alot has been on my mind. I suppose children sense it easily when parents are stressed, upset or simply worried.

My youngest son, 9 years old Eman, has an amazing sense of humor and whats even more remarkable is his timing. He has confidence, he is methodical and he is witty. What a combination of extraordinary traits. Truly quite unlike how I was when I was as old as he is today !  If/when my folks were ill when I was young, I would really panic and hold onto my grandma for support and assurance.  These boys are really far more confident than me when I was old as them 🙂

Today when I was bringing back Eman from his after school activities, there was a silence for sometime from the back seat (quite unlike him) . Then he asked what really had me all mushy inside.

“Mama, what will happen to me, if you pass away ?”

A question every mother dreads yet answers always in the positive with alot of assurance lest her prized possession worries himself.  The question came out of a bolt and in the few seconds that I registered it and formed an appropriate answer in my mind, with “almost tears” building up in my eyes  .. .. ..

He continued to ask with serious concern in his voice, ” I mean, who’s going to teach me how to get a credit card or how to get a drivers licence.?????

It took me a few seconds more to zap back those tears and realize, he had ofcourse pulled off a loaded one on me !!! Kids, I tell you. What worries these little chaps have at age 9 !!!

When he was 7 years old, he has hurt his knee pretty bad, in a soccer game. While the nurse tended to him, without shedding a tear, he asked his class teacher a question, she related to me the following afternoon.  He asked her quite seriously, “Does that mean, its the end of my soccer career ?? Give me the truth Miss ”

We really had a laugh that day thinking of how my 7 year old worries about his soccer career !

Then on another occasion he was asked to sing a couple of songs for a bunch of relatives whom we were visiting in India, whom we knew rather briefly, just to break ice with them we encouraged him to sing a couple of english songs.  Ofcourse, he loves an audience and after his performance, he got a loud applause. He bowed down several times, and blew kisses at everybody saying “Thank you .. thank you … you are too kind … I love this audience. He must have been 7 then. His comments amazed them more than his songs did.

Such is my little son. A witty charmer. So I think, he’s going to do pretty well with me and even after me ! Inshallah.

Child Marriage !!

 

Observe the expression on the girl's face sitting on the right ! Priceless :)

A six-year-old boy told his father he wanted to marry the little girl across the street.  

The father, being modern and well-schooled in  handling children, hid his smile behind his hand.    
   ‘That’s a serious step,’ he said.      

‘Have you thought it out completely?’  

‘Yes,’ his young son answered.  

‘We can spend one week in my room and the next in hers.  It’s right across the street, so I can run home if I get scared of the dark.’                

‘How about transportation?’ the father asked.
 ‘I have my wagon, and we both have our tricycles,’   the little boy answered.

                
The boy had an answer to every question the father raised.                

       Finally, in exasperation, his dad asked, ‘What about babies?  When you’re married,  you’re liable to have babies, you know.’

‘We’ve thought about that, too,’  
the little boy replied.  
             
         ‘We’re not going to have babies.                
Every time she lays an egg,

I’m going to step on it!
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxo
 
        NOW THAT’S BIRTH CONTROL-!        

Playing Santa in January.

Today was Samie’s last vacation day and lo ! feeling so sad that he wont be enjoying the relaxation with us from tomorrow. This vacation although was the first where we were in Dubai but it was so much fun and calming. There were no obligations, no stress, no forced shopping, and definetly no early mornings !! It was truck loads of fun.

Sam arrived rather late after picking up Eman from school and before I knew it, there were heaps of presents he bought for all of us. Okay so let me start with me, he got me this marinade tray with board, a full set of knife set AND, AND AND ………. He also bought this really handy tool box. You see sam generally offers his salat in my studio and wonders how I manage to create anything in the middle of all the  clutter and chaos in my studio. This nice man wanted to make it easy and get my space alittle organized so voila, what a lovely and thought ful gift.

Oh yeah, and the kids got something too, they love washing Sam and my car, but by the end of it, there are gallons upon gallons spend on the shower so he got them the pressure kit for washing the cars to make the chore fun and more economical for us.

Oh and how could he forget “the other” kids. Pepper has claimed the new catnip and cat scratch tray as his own. He has strongly placed it as not limit zone for poor Keiki. 

There isnt a day that passes by when I dont thank my Allah for blessing me with the most compassionate and thoughtful man. I wanted to share the pictures with you’ll.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

On the other hand, have you wondered why husbands come up with the most practical and productive gifts for their wives and where does all the romance disappear with chocolates and flowers ???

If I were one of em thankless women, I would be thinking there are vibes I am getting from these gifts like

” Lady. We need to eat more bbq meals ! 

” Get your chaos Organized. Woman !!

” Wash the car more often boys” !!

Last but the most important : Get those paws  outta my couch and into your own turf !!

 USE that scratching pad !!!!! 

But thats just the humor in me .. have to have the last laugh now 🙂

New Year’s Eve at The World’s Tallest Tower.

A Very blessed year to all of you reading this post ! 2010 came with a mixed bag of fortunate and very unfortunate events like salt and pepper but finally we can put all that behind us and move forward.

To all those of you, feeling low right now, please remember, it could be worse. Please try to see where you are fortunate in so many other ways and dont despair your situation. There is so much more we should be thankful about. Good health would have to be right there on top of that list ! Loneliness is a dread but atleast being alive and in good health is better than being with selfish and calculating companions. Please friends, Keep the faith.

Well for me the last couple of weeks were total relaxation.

A couple a good news : 

  • I won the basic grey blog candy. Which was a first for me ! If you havent won anything yet or if you have won too, you know exactly how excieting it is winning something. Especially something you really like. It may be sometime before which I receive my prize though.
  • I am cleared of my tumor which I was on treatment for over the last 6 months for. That is really “GREAT” news and a relief !!!

For the last decade we have spend every New Year eve in our home country but really felt so alienated and dependant on others becoz we really were there in our own country only as ‘visitors’ !  And finally this winter we are here and we spend the new years eve watching the fireworks at the super phenomenal Burj Khalifa ! It was just great ! Dubai was chilled cold last night. And just having the freedom to travel anywhere at any hour here, is so so great. We really are fortunate to be living in such a country without fear of carrying our national documents, or fear of being stolen, fear of not carrying enough eatables coz nearly all the petrol pumps have a fantastic grocer which is 24 hours.  Counting small pleasures. 

Here are just a couple of pictures of the celebration last night :

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

A medical tip for mothers.

Last 10 days, the boys and I have been absolutely sick to our throats, no literally ! It started with Sawaab and ended with me. Today Dr L, gave me a second course of antibiotics.  I have been wheezing and it hurts like hell when I have this huge spasms of cough which feels like all my chest is pulling and hurting. So back to the nebulizer. Just finished with Augmentine 1gm and now I have started with Klassic. Its really a bad time. As if, the knee and my back ache were not enough !

Please make a small prayer that Allah heals me soon.

Talking of sickness, I wanted to know from the rest of you’ll, which do you think is the most important medical investment do, you think, you made for your kids ? … I mean, I’m not talking about medicines or medical insurance. Maybe something like a thermometer, or a blood pressure machine or a kidney tray or something else.

I think, almost 7 years back, I made the best medical investment I could have thought of at that time. Sawaab is not asthmatic, but he would get these bouts of cold accompanied by wheezing. At one stage, the doctor suggested that if we could, we should buy a nebulizer which would help him with wheezing. With those of you who are wondering “whats wheezing and whats a nebulizer ?

Well, generally phlem which clogs the throat over a period of time, might in some situations land up in the upper respirator tract, and cause breathing difficulty. There is a particular sound almost like a slow whistle which can be heard while the child or adult breaths. It can be accompanied by pain in the chest. Next question: Generally in the olden days, the doctors would have to give a patient oral medicines which when swolled, breaks up in the stomach and then reaches different parts of the body. A bronco syrup would help in dissolving the phelm in the throat. However a nebulizer is an excellent machine used for breathing with a mask. In most cases, Ventolin, is added to the machine and breathed in. The results are instant and phenomenal. However, one should be a little experienced in handling this machine. Why ?

1: becoz we are inhaling directly what ever is in the container of the machine, we have  to be careful with the hygeine issues.

2: the medicine in the machine is going straight to the lung and heart in which case, we have to be careful with the quantity of medicine given, coz it can cause palpitation, in very few cases.

The nebulizer is given “ONLY” when recommended by the doctor. However as a mother, you learn to watch and understand the symptoms of your child over a period of time, and sometimes, When I am confident that it should be given rather than waiting over the weekend, before going to my pediatrician, I would just go ahead and do it.

Hope this little article helps some of you moms out there.

Arabian Ranches Market Day and Being MOM.

I think one of the best things about being Mom is the love that I am constantly surrounded with. Theres a never ending supply of hugs and affection from every quarter in my home. I feel so blessed that I have sons who are always so happy to please me. If a woman wants to feel like a queen, she just has to have sons like I do. I know I havent been the best of Moms. I, like most mums, have a truck load of shortcomings, and probably becoz my boys have not seen any better, they feel, I am the Best !

I know I am hard on them.

I know I push them with their studies.

I know I dont put as much time with them as I would want to, in playing games or in any creative activity.

 I know the supper is not always on time, and sometimes, Manu, is only too happy to have his banana and chocolate milk to sleep off ..

I know I have little control on the scale of my vocal cords.

I know I am mean sometimes, I know I am weak sometimes, I know I havent tried enough sometimes, and I know I have tried too hard sometimes but being Mom, so many things get accepted by these young boys who know no better that I am merely a mother trying to fix too many problems, multitasking all the time and frustrated most of the time..

Last friday, we participated in the first fair since samie’s surgery, 6 months back. The amount of hardwork and teamwork I got from my below 10 year olds would put any management team to shame.  Piling up the materials, walking past the field with heavy boxes in arm, helping mom lay out the display stalls, hear her mouthfull of panicky screams and shouts, and then actually manage a table all by themselves…. where do you get such children mashallah !!

They are truly amazing. Allah swt must really love me for such a super fantastic gift.

I have posted this slide just to give you a glimpse of what effort went into making that fair such a roaring sucess for me. You’ll find Sawaab and Manu actually selling things and I was most surprised when one customer queried why the hand made card was alittle higher and Bilal, said quite naturally, ” coz my mother puts in alot of her time and creativity to make sure no two cards are the same.”  Shucks ~!~ I WAS BLOWN !!!  The boys were oozing of enthusiasm and confidence. They have coz they have been participating with me for the past 3-4 years and have been watching me since …

Please enjoy watching my family making the most of the Arabian Ranches Market day !

http://naush.slide.com/

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Back to school comes with a package …

Back to school has become a trendsetter. It actually means, get ready armed with new, stationery, books, uniforms, shoes, school bag, pencil case, lunch bag/carrier and probably a couple of other things which I hav’nt been indulging in.   Probably more than my boys, I enjoy the whole thing about “Back to school”. Although it reminds me of how it used to be when we were kids and appreciated the new school bag which would actually live for that entire 10 months period or the shoes that we would so carefully polish for the first month or so.  But even without the memories, I completly enjoy the process of filling up the kids bags with goodies (as I call them) 

And now that school has commenced in full swing, one of the jobs that keeps me busy for a good couple of hours in the night is and which incidently also reminds me of how my dad used to sit over the short weekend we had, ” back in those days” : covering/laminating books !

Strange how you can love playing with paper, scissor and glue and yet when you have to cover books which by the way is a very lame way to do books, can be so exhausting and back breaking. I know scores of parents all over the globe are involved in doing so but I wonder what they must feel, when I, atleast enjoy part of the process, being into alter art and all that.

Here’s a pic of some of the heaps of books being and having to be covered. Sitting on Eman’s desk in the study room.

A Mess on Eman's desk

    In fact, I think this just gave me an idea, I think I should actually make a tutorial of how to cover books for all those first time moms and dads !!

Back to school in Dubai 2010

One never knows what to expect but if we place our trust in the Almighty, then you know that you are in safe hands. 6 month back. we were totally uncertain of where we stood; no clue as to what was in store even remotely and yet, our belief and faith paid off. The kids started school this monday. It was a day of apprehension and anxiety.

Buddy and sawaabi were going to use the bus the first time in 8years. I was a bunch of nerves constantly reminding myself that they would be ok ! Its strange how I generally underestimate my boys ! Well, my main concern is how sawaabi loves to go back and forth even before he climbs onto the bus. He is one restless soul !

The morning started around 5:30 and atmosphere in the house was like that it had been hit by a hurricane …. We were rushing the kids thru the morning routine of brush, bath, dress, breakfast, shoes and bags. Although it seems simple but ask any parent and you know exactly what goes into that morning rush hour. So anyways, now we have Buddy and sawaab leaving at 6:30 followed by Eman leaving at 7:00 with Abba. And then, I have the entire 4 hours to hybernate !

Heres just a couple of pics of the morning :

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

 

Lessons from 2010 ~ part 2.

Just a day before we had sam admitted for the operation. Twas Bilal's birthday.11 May 2010

Two days after Sam’s surgery, he was still in the ICU. I needed to stay close to him so I slept for a couple of hours in the common ladies waiting room in the night and kept waiting for the visiting hours the rest of the time. I had not visited the kids the first 5 days. There was a large, safe and clean cafeteria which was 24 hours so really almost all my immediate needs were taken care of.  Needlessto say, I hardly slept. I would be seen prowling constantly infront of the ICU, waiting for visiting hours to begin.

Most of the security guards and cleaners and nurses had come to know me very well by now. And one thing I was asked several times, is how I managed to keep so composed ! I remember, a distant friend of mine called once and tried to console me briefly; becoz she did not know all the details, she almost made me feel, “like its not the end of the world”.

It took a whole lot of patience and maturance to not snap back at her. Perhaps my state of mind and patience was already stretched beyond its capacity and here, I had someone telling me, that it could’nt be all the bad !! I must have been alittle sharp in my tone, although I said nothing offensive. This friend came all the way from Dubai to check up on Sam in the evening while I was in the cafeteria. By the time I returned, She had already seen  Sam.  She came over to me and just broke down in tears.   Human emotions are fragile. I learnt just how very fragile.  I found myself consoling her that evening !!

During those first 2 weeks, my telephone was flooded with calls. Calls from abroad, local calls, dozens of sms’s. At some stage, I almost felt like a telephone operator and at some other times, like telephone voice message. I nearly detested it having to answer the calls and repeat the same updates over and over !  Most of the calls that came from Sam’s friends had a similar feel to it.

It went something like this :

“How did this happen ?

” “Why did’nt he tell us ?”

 “I found out thru so and so ”

“How did you’ll diagnose it ?”

“Why dont you get it done in India?”

“Let me know if you need anything ”

Duh !!! As if !!!!!!! I realized that we should be careful in what we say to a person when he going thru an ordeal especially one which involves health. He sits there feeling “how would you know, you dont have this problem” while we ask all the silly questions and even offer our unwanted advice !!

Nobody really knows whats going thru the mind of a person sinking in his boat except he himself !! so why pretend to have answers. But I suppose its a polite etiquette or ritual to do so !!!

Trying so hard to ease his pain... young sawaab

In all of Sam’s friends, there was only one guy whom he has disclosed his condition to, and also explained in detail about the operation.  Instead of making the effort of being around with us, he calls two days later wanting to know how things were !!! His wife had the audacity to state that 8 months back, when she was in India where her mother was sick, We didnt call on her in India, we just visited her hubby here !!! Thats friendship for you.

I learnt that encouragement, support and compassion does not necessarily come from those whom we know for sure will show it. Many a times, there can be a big disappointment. And many a times, it can come from a totally unexpected corner !! Therefore, its best to pin hopes only from Allah swt. He is the creator, he will create a way. . .

The lesser your expectation, the better chance you’ve got a solid relationship !! In all honesty, I dont believe in what I just said.     How can one not have expectations from someone you speak to virtually everyday ??? Someone whom you share your domestic secrets and office hassels ???

I realized now, that someone going thru trauma, doesnt need our silly superficial talks, he just needs genuine concern and someone who can listen and perhaps understand. Not judge. Never Judge !

I’ve learnt that Health, Wealth and children are a man’s biggest assets and they are also his biggest weakness too. He is most vulnerable when there is a deficiency in either his health or his wealth and if his children are away or hurt.

On the left is samie's surgeon, Dr Ziani and on the right is Dr ousama at Sheikh Khailifa Medical city.

I also learnt that what ever our sickness is, the two extreme way approach is not really the best.

Either we focus on the sickness so much that all our positive energy is drained and we’re completly touchy and depressed all the time.

On the other hand, completly living in denial and trying to carry on with life as though nothing has happened is not going to take us anywhere too.

When a disease strikes, it is a way of the body responding and telling us that something wrong is happening. why ignore and live in denial that alls well. We have to make positive changes to cure our problem.

Earlier I never stopped sam from the quantity he ate, or the amount of his salt intake, or from munching those                in-between snacks or hogging on all those nihari’s and ghee smothered parathas !! How much could our body take ?? Naturally we made changes. How could we not ??

I’ve also learnt that staying in a hospital, no matter how plush and sophisticated it is, can be quiet a sad and lonely experience. There’s a reason why Muslims have a sunnah, which is to visit the sick and that too it states, how and for how long should the visit last and what should be spoken off when visiting.

While we were transfered to the private room from the ICU, a bunch of volunteers had organized an hour program for the long staying patients of the hospital. They got out their guitars and sang lovely songs, some played board games and some card games. It was so refreshing to see the smiles on the elderly patients, who had, by now, gotten so used to staying over long periods of isolation ! 

A visit to the hospital can really make a great difference in the life of the patient and it makes us realize how fortunate we are for being blessed with good health too. we may feel, what good would a single short visit from us do for a patient, what we probably dont realize is how he/she may not have had seen family, friends or relatives for so long and a short talk with them may make them feel “wanted” or “not forgotten”  Try it, you’ll know what I mean.

This post was not supposed to get long, but perhaps I “Have” learnt quite a bit. I really hope, what I have learnt from my experience helps you to make even one single change in your life.

Come back to read the 3rd Part of “lessons from 2010”

Should Kids witness childbirth ? A True Story .. ..

It was late at night and Heidi, who was expecting her second child, was home alone with her 3-year old daughter Katelyn. When Heidi started going into labor, she called “911”.

Due to a power outage at the time, only one paramedic responded to the call. The house was very, very dark, so the paramedic asked Katelyn to hold a flashlight high over her mommy so he could see while he helped deliver the baby.
Very diligently, Katelyn did as she was asked.

Heidi pushed and pushed, and after a little while Connor was born. The paramedic lifted him by his little feet and spanked him on his bottom. Connor began to cry. The paramedic then thanked Katelyn for her help and asked the wide-eyed 3-year old what she thought about what she had just witnessed.

Katelyn quickly responded, “He shouldn’t have crawled in there in the first place. Smack him again!”

The Special Mother.

I found this poem on a fellow bloggers site. It was posted there because she is a mother who knows the pain.   I hope it touches you as it touched me

The Special Mother
by Erma Bombeck

Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social pressure and a couple by habit.

This year nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of handicapped children. Did you ever wonder how these mothers are chosen? Somehow I visualize God hovering over Earth selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation.


As he observes, he instructs his angels to take notes in a giant ledger.


“Forrest, Marjorie, daughter. Patron Saint, Celia.”


“Rutledge, Carrie, twins. Patron Saint…give her Gerard. He’s used to profanity.”

Armstrong, Beth, son. Patron Saint, Matthew.”

Finally he passes a name to an angel and smiles.

“Give her a handicapped child.”


The angel is curious. “Why this one, God? She’s so happy.”


“Exactly,” smiles God.


“But does she have the patience?” asks the angel.


“I don’t want her to have too much patience, or she’ll drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wear off she’ll handle it.”


“I watched her today. She has that sense of self and independence so rare and so necessary in a mother. You see, the child I’m going to give her has a world of it’s own. She has to make it live in her world, and that’s not going to be easy.”


“But Lord, I don’t think she even believes in you.”


The angel gasps, “Selfishness? Is that a virtue?”

She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life
because she is doing my work as surely as she is here by my side.”

“And what about her Patron Saint?” asks the angel, his pen poised in the air.

Could I give a handicapped child a mother who knows no laughter? That would be cruel.”

God smiles.

“No matter, I can fix that. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness.”

God nods.

“If she can’t separate herself from the child occasionally, she will never survive. Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect. She doesn’t know it yet, but she is to be envied. She will never take for granted a spoken word.
She will never consider a step ordinary. When her child says momma for the first time, she will be witness to a miracle and know it. I will permit her to see clearly the things I see–ignorance, cruelty, prejudice–and allow her to rise above them.

God smiles.

“A mirror will suffice.”

Something to smile about .. .. .. ..

Rather than let the doom and gloom bring you down, focus on the positive.  Life’s simple pleasures which we take for granted.  Little things like .. .. .. .. .. .. ..

  • finding forgotten money in a pocket
  • the joy of free refills at a restaurants
  • being able to fix a faulty electronic equipment with a smack.
  • When u stay somewhere with a really good shower
  • When your pet notices your in a bad mood and comes to see you
  • when a friend returns something borrowed so long ago you forgot you owned it
  • when you push the button for the elevator and its already there
  • getting something handwritten in the mail
  • packing a picnic and heading off for some outdoor action without paying a dime
  • when you pull up to red light and the guy infront of you nudges up a bit so you can make a right turn.
  • leaving a comment on someones blog
  • getting a comment 

A Wise Gardener.

A little boy went into a store, reached for a soda carton and pulled it over to the telephone. He climbed onto the carton so that he could reach the buttons on the phone and proceeded to punch in seven digits. The store owner observed and listened to the conversation.

The boy asked, “Maam, Can you give me the job of cutting your lawn?” The woman replied, “I already have someone to cut my lawn.”

“I will cut your lawn for half the price of the person who cuts your lawn now.” replied the boy. The woman responded that she was very satisfied with the person who was presently cutting her lawn.

The little boy was even more perseverant and said, “I’ll even sweep your curb and your sidewalk, so on Sunday you will have the prettiest lawn in all of Palm beach, Florida.” Again the woman answered in the negative.

With a smile on his face, the little boy replaced the receiver.

The store owner, who was listening to this conversation, walked over to the boy and said, “Son… I like your attitude; I like that positive spirit and would like to offer you a job.”

The little boy replied, “No thanks, I was just checking my performance on the job I already have. I am the one who is working for the lady I was talking to!”