women !!

  How many women with MENOPAUSE does it take to change a light bulb?

 Woman’s Answer:

 One! ONLY ONE!!!! And do you know WHY?

 Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb! They don’t even know that the bulb is BURNED OUT!!

 They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it out. And, once they figured it out, they wouldn’t be able to find the #&%!* light bulbs despite the fact that they’ve been in the SAME CABINET for the past 17 YEARS!

 But if they did, by some miracle, actually find them, 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!!!!! AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE WRAPPER THE FREAKING LIGHT BULBS CAME IN!!! BECAUSE NO ONE EVER PICKS UP OR CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!!!!

 IT’S A WONDER WE HAVEN’T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE A FOOT DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS PLACE!

 AND DON’T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON WHO CHANGES THE TOILET PAPER ROLL !!

 I’m sorry. What was the question?

 

Yeah that sounds exactly like me !!! and here’s another one :   Anyone who has ever dressed a child will love this one!

Did you hear about the Texas teacher who was helping one of her kindergarten students put on his cowboy boots?

He asked for help and she could see why. Even with her pulling and him pushing, the little boots still didn’t want to go on. Finally, when the second boot was on, she had worked up a sweat. She almost cried when the little boy said, “Teacher, they’re on the wrong feet.”

 She looked and sure enough, they were. It wasn’t any easier pulling the boots off than it was putting them on. She managed to keep her cool as together they worked to get the boots back on – this time on the right feet.

 He then announced, “These aren’t my boots.”

 She bit her tongue rather than get right in his face and scream, “Why didn’t you say so?” like she wanted to. And, once again she struggled to help him pull the ill-fitting boots off his little feet.

 No sooner they got the boots off and he said, “They’re my brother’s boots. My Mom made me wear ’em.”

 Now she didn’t know if she should laugh or cry. But, she mustered up the grace and courage she had left to wrestle the boots on his feet again.

 Helping him into his coat, she asked, “Now, where are your mittens?”

He said, “I stuffed ’em in the toes of my boots.”

Is this school for me ?

what a constructive weekend that was ! But I suppose That is just ME. can work best under pressure. I knew this last week would be terribly busy but to think of it that we could pack so many chores in just two days and achieve it ! Wow .. its such a good feeling of having completed all of them. AND that too, draging the poor boys everywhere with us.

So I am finding some direction for the school thingy that has been sitting on my chest for the last 7 months ! All the while we had one particular school in mind but we so concerned with some of vibes that I had been getting. It so happens that, when I just got fed up of the whole thing and said we’ll put them back to the old/previous school, we decided to check up on a school I had checked 3 years back and as it turns out, they do have teachers who understand the concept of dyslexia and although they are not trained to teach in special ways, they can assist coz the class room size is quite small, only 13 kids per class, which ofcourse is good for us. So we have that appointment and assesment today which will decide if this is the school for us. I am very nervous coz I think this might be the last hope for US, and to think of it that the boys have not touched their books in the last 3 months !!! Suddenly I found myself asking the boys oral maths sums and thank God I got a few right answers ! I will post some information about dyslexia in my next post for all those parents who are wondering what is this term.

Today was the first day of Ramadan, inshallah. To all the Muslim brothers and Sisters out there, Ramadan Mubarak. Please remember the gates of hell are closed this entire month, Shaitaan (Satan) is chained. It will be easier to control our ill desires, tempers and temptations this month. Please remember the Merit of salaat in this month. Please remember that this is the most loved and crucial month to our Rasool Sal alah wa alai hi wa salam. Please remember that we all are examples for the rest of the world and where Islam is so wrongly looked upon, we all have to change the misconceptions by setting good examples by ourselves. Inshallah.

Quotes on teachers or teaching

Some of the inspirational quotes are on teaching I hope to categorize most of these quotes alittle later.

 What you give for the cause of charity in health is gold; what you give in sickness is silver; what you give after death is lead.

 “If you find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn’t lead anywhere” – anonymous

 “It isn’t the load that weighs us down – it’s the way we carry it.” (Anon.)

He who dares to teach must never cease to learn. – Anonymous

All learning begins with the simple phrase, “I don’t know“.

When love and skill work together, expect a masterpiece. John Ruskin

“They may forget what you said, But they will never forget how you made them feel.”

Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are endless. ~ Mother Teresa

The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.–Alvin Toffler

It is not so much what is poured into the student, but what is planted that really counts.” – Unknown

“The secret of teaching is to appear to have known all your life what you learned this afternoon.” – Anonymous

“One father is worth 100 schoolmasters.” – George Herbert

“By learning you will teach, by teaching you will learn.” – Latin Proverb

“If the student fails to learn, the teacher fails to teach.” –

“The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.”

“To teach is to learn twice.” – Joseph Joubert

Challenge of the day : Find something good in everyone. – Unknown

“Whether you think you can or think you can’t – you are right.” – Henry Ford

“Teach a child how to think, not what to think.” – Sidney Sugarman

“When a teacher calls a boy by his entire name, it means trouble.” – Mark Twain

Teacher : The child’s third parent.” – Hyman Berston

“The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains. The superior teacher demonstrates. The great teacher inspires.” – William Ward

“I touch the future. I teach.” – Christa McAuliffe.

“To teach is to touch lives forever.” – Anonymous

“Good teacher is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.” – Gail Godwin

“Teaching kids to count is fine, but teaching them what counts is best.” – Bob Talbert